USAAC Moving Main Office
 

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE – APRIL 1, 2015

USAAC Relocating Main Office

Joining the chorus of courageous corporations protesting the Indiana Religious Freedom Restoration Act, the United States Automobile Association Club (USAAC) announced today that it is relocating its main offices outside of Indiana. “Although we have no reason to doubt Indiana Governor Mike Pence when he says the law doesn’t say what it says, doesn’t do what it does, doesn’t mean what it means and won’t be used the way it will be used, we still believe that leaving Indiana is the right thing to do,” a USAAC spokesman said. “USAAC’s approach to diversity has been shaped by our fan base, which runs the gamut all the way from A to B, from the absolutely albino to the somewhat sunburned, from the merely aged to the soon-to-be-dead, from the male to the not female.”

“Although we respect the Hoosier traditions of inclusiveness and tolerance as exemplified by the rise of the Indiana Klan (which, due to a lack of Colored People, had to focus on Catholics and Jews) we wish to make the following point: Mario Andretti and Mauri Rose.”

“Even if we wanted to comply with the new law we couldn’t, since our current offices are too small to accommodate the required Straight Only rest rooms, drinking fountains and lunch counters. Although we have not yet selected a new location for our offices, we have narrowed the field to four: San Francisco, Key West, Fire Island and Provincetown. Our architect is planning a tall, cylinder shaped building topped by a bifurcated sphere and the dedication ceremony will include a rendition of ‘Back Home Again in Indiana’ by Jim Nabors.”

This article is fictional. Any similarity to persons or organizations without satiric intent is purely coincidental. April Fool.

Re: USAAC Moving Main Office
 

Theres nothing even funny about this

Re: USAAC Moving Main Office
 

It is April 1 day!

Re: USAAC Moving Main Office
 

Even with this being an April fools joke or not, I find it funny all these businesses say they are going to leave or not do any business activities in Indiana when there are many, many other states with the same laws on the books all ready.

Re: USAAC Moving Main Office
 

Or Apple who sets up distribution centers in countrys that behead lbgt.

Re: USAAC Moving Main Office
 

Exactly, just typical hysteria because people don't choose to read and make their own informed opinions. They would rather go with the media pushing for the emotional side of it. It is freedom to all people and it's sad they had to put another law on the books when the first amendment should be enough.

Just ask Arkansas . Don't mess with wal mart. Lol